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Season’s Greetings from The Daily Norm!

This is a very small post with a big Christmas wish for all readers of The Daily Norm and everyone in the blogosphere. The Daily Norm has been far from “daily” in the last week – a personal tragedy in my family has meant that my attentions have, sadly, been turned to other things. However in writing this post, I am hoping that across the world, a merry Christmas has been spent by the great majority, while wishing that for all of us, the New Year will bring with it happier, successful and fulfilling times.

Also, for those Norm fans amongst you, Normy’s adventures through the 12 Days of Christmas will soon return, as well as a host of festive foodie posts and my selection of my favourite photos from 2012. See you then, and in the meantime, Season’s Greetings and very best wishes to all.

Santa Norm (2011, acrylic on canvas) © Nicholas de Lacy-Brown

Santa Norm (2011, acrylic on canvas) © Nicholas de Lacy-Brown

Wellcome Death: A Self-Portrait

When one of my favourite friends, fellow blogger Celia, told me that she was going to spend her honeymoon in Mexico during “Dia de los Muertos” I got almost as excited as if I were going myself. Ever since developing an early obsession with the art of Frida Kahlo, and in turn the film Frida starring Salma Hayek, I have been fascinated by the Mexican celebration of the dead, in which they make and paint brightly coloured papier mache skulls, masks and skeletons, often adorned with hearts and flowers and all number of patterns, and parade them out in the streets. I even painted a Muertos skull in my recent painting of the city of Salamanca in Spain (below). Having never been to Mexico, I half-heartedly asked Celia to bring be back a “Muertos doll” never actually expecting that on her honeymoon, she would give me a second thought.

Salamanca (2012 © Nicholas de Lacy-Brown, oil on canvas, 105 cm x 90 cm)

Salamanca (2012 © Nicholas de Lacy-Brown, oil on canvas, 105 cm x 90 cm)

DSC08541But last week, amazing as she is, and freshly returned from the tropics of that South American paradise, she presented to me what must be the ultimate in double whammy presents – a Frida Kahlo doll with a Muertos skeleton face (pictured)! The doll is frankly amazing, combining all the fun and spirit of Kahlo’s works, including the occasional morbidity which creeps into her often pain-expressing paintings. No sooner had I lovingly placed said doll alongside my Frida Kahlo art catalogue on my book shelves (from the Tate Modern expo some years back), I then heard about another exhibition which has recently hit the streets of London – not of Kahlo, but of Death.

My Frida doll!

My Frida doll!

I know what you’re thinking, death, as the subject of an exhibition? Isn’t that likely to be morbid, or heartwrenching, or just plain scary? Well if you’re thinking those things, you probably don’t know the Wellcome Collection on Euston Road in London, a superb gallery adjunct of the Wellcome Trust, who regularly organises fascinating exhibitions of art and curiosities with a decidedly medical theme. The latest exhibition explores the theme of death and our preoccupation both with death, and combating death, in society.

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The exhibition comprises the vast and varied collection of Richard Harris, a former antique print dealer from Chicago and explores the subject in a brilliantly diverse array of mediums, themes and expressions. Upon entering the gallery, we were met by Jodie Carey’s 2009 work, In the Eyes of Others (2009), a giant chandelier made entirely of bones. Sadly, the bones were not real bones, but rather plastic reproductions, and therefore this did not have quite the same effect as a chapel I once visited in Rome, the Capuchin Crypt, made entirely from human bones (very morbid, but unusually architecturally beautiful). However, it set us up for a show which ranged from the oldest of 15th century art, to ambitious contemporary pieces.

In the Eyes of Others by Jodie Carey (2009)

In the Eyes of Others by Jodie Carey (2009)

The Capuchin Crypt, Rome

The Capuchin Crypt, Rome

The first room explored the theme, Contemplating Death, comprising examples from throughout history of memento mori (Latin for “remember you will die”), the well-advised reminder to us all that we should seize the day because all of us, inevitably, will be dead one day. This ranged from the classically painted Vanitas still life from 16th century Belgium, the skull sat amongst the clutter of Saint Jerome’s cell by Dürer.

Vanitas still life

Vanitas still life

Up next was the Dance of Death, a room which focused on the universal certainty of death, regardless of status in life. This included many a depiction of the Danse Macabre, in which feverish revelry united humans with skeletons, works intended to dissuade people from self-indulgence and vanity in life. I loved the beautiful, almost introspective solace of the dead skeleton sat upon a table in June Leaf’s sculpture, Gentleman on Green Table (1999-2000), as well as the Mondongo Collective’s The Skull Series, in which a huge sculpted scull made from plasticine was, upon closer inspection, a detailed exploration of the influence of the US and Europe upon the world.

June Leaf, Gentleman on Green Table

June Leaf, Gentleman on Green Table

 

Mondongo Collective, The Skull Series. Number eight from a series of 12. Plasticine

Mondongo Collective, The Skull Series. Number eight from a series of 12. Plasticine

For me, the third room, which explored the representation of death in its most violent form, was by far the most powerful and engaging works of the lot. Featuring some examples of the series The Disasters of War (Los Desastres de la Guerra) by Francisco Goya, this room gave us confrontational and often hard-to-view representations of war and death agony. Goya’s etchings are a brilliant and deeply moving representation of Napoleon’s invasion of Spain at the beginning of the 19th Century. Seeing these images gives some indication of why Goya, having experienced the horrors of war, went from being sycophantic portrait painter of polite society, to creator of the stunning and deeply disturbing Black Paintings held within Madrid’s Prado gallery.

Goya, Tampoco (1810-20)

Goya, Tampoco (1810-20)

Detail from one of Goya's Black Paintings

Detail from one of Goya’s Black Paintings

Goya’s etchings have since influenced a number of artists, including Picasso and the Chapman Brothers, but perhaps none more so than German artist Otto Dix, whose series of 51 etchings entitled Der Krieg (War) based on his gruesome experiences in the trenches during WW1, were also on display alongside the Goya works which inspired them. Dix’s etchings were incredibly moving, and unapologetic in their gruesome and violent portrayal of war, death, and devastating injury. All in black and white, these works didn’t need the vivid red of blood to convey the horror of the WW1 deathtol. Rather, in their monochromatic greys and blacks, they perfectly portrayed the grim horror of those times.

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Dix, Wounded Soldier

Dix, Wounded Soldier

Dix, Machine Gunners Advancing

Dix, Machine Gunners Advancing

It was perhaps with some relief that the fourth gallery showed us a lighter view of death – in fact, rather unusually, death’s relationship with eroticism as representations of death were shown intertwined with the nude and appearing to infiltrate the embrace of lovers. In this room, I loved the little optical illusion postcards which reminded me a bit of Dali. The skull appears in each to be the most prominent symbol, but look again and you can see a perfectly innocent domestic scene, which bears no relation at all to the skull which it at first appears to represent.

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La Vie et la Mort, Leben und Tod (Postcard c.1900-10)

The final room was a representation of the Dia de los muertos festival which has so fascinated me, along with other cultural representations of death in society around the world. I was particularly drawn towards Dan Salvo’s photos of shrines and elaborate altars (known as ofrendas) which are designed to welcome the spirits of those who have departed. I also loved the wall of Muertos dolls straight out of Mexico.

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So with some greater sense of joy, we left the exhibition, full of joys of the Mexican carnival, that was at least until we saw the last wall of the show which gave statistics about the causes of death around the world. Then our joy turned to slightly less jovial stark realism mixed with scientific curiosity as, captivated, we spent a good 5 minutes fascinated by the statistics which show that, far from the horrors of war, the greatest killer of mankind is the role of disease, illness and other irreparable physical conditions. Now if that isn’t a reminder to seize the day, I don’t know what is.

Death: A Self-Portrait is on at the Wellcome Collection until 24 February 2013

 

It’s beginning to feel a lot like Christmas – Part II

Christmas isn’t just about the festive spirit outside of doors, although as I demonstrated yesterday, in London, the tangible celebration of Christmas evident all around certainly helps to get one in the mood. But it’s indoors, in the home, that the real heart of Christmas beats a unified rhythm with the yuletide spirit, and personally, I cannot get enough of the constant reinvention of my home in its Christmas guise, from the comforting glow of my Christmas trees at the break of a still dark winter’s morning, and the spirited twinkling dance of fairy lights to the jig of Christmas pop playing on the radio, to the reflective flicker of candlelight as the day draws to a close, and my home is lit exclusively by the staccato movement of my tree lights and the red warming glow of my candles lit in almost every room.

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In fact so fervent is our love for the ambience given off within our Christmas-decked home that my partner and I have a moment, just before going to bed, when we play some choral carols or, even better, monastery chants, emulating a Christmas straight from medieval times, and with that soothing soundtrack, set about sitting, calmly in the subdued light of our Christmas trees, watching the lights and sparkle dance and flicker around the room. It’s almost epiphanaic to meditate amongst such warm Christmas tranquillity, and is almost certainly my favourite time of the day.

Now I’ve already shown you my Christmas decorations in two posts a few weeks back (links below), but this post is, I suppose, further reflections on a theme – my almost poetic interaction with the yuletide spirit manifesting all around me both in words and pictures. Moving to the latter, posted here are some further glimpses of my Christmas expression around my home. I start with my Scandinavian forest, an oasis of calm, an installation of little small Christmas trees intermingled with cute forest animals – I’ve noticed that this simple, white Scandinavian style has really hit it off in London this year with all its woods, and whites and an emphasis on nature. I love nothing more than lighting these beautiful sparkling silver tealights amidst my forest, creating in so doing something akin to a magical Narnia-like wonderland which comes alive under the candles’ gentle flickering.

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Talking of candles, one of my favourite parts of Christmas has to be decorating the table, whether it be for the big event on Christmas day, or for a small meal in the run up to the 25th. I usually incorporate as much foliage as I can, including oranges and pine trees, red berries and fir cones, and then set amongst the foliage many candles of different shapes and sizes. Then I like to leave the candles to burn gradually down, lighting up the foliage around them with a warming winter glow.

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Moving on to more of my decorations, here is another homage to the Scandinavian Christmas, where the fusion of a glitter covered tree hung with delicate glass baubles appears to emulate droplets of ice hanging in a snow-covered forest.

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I also love these photos of my Christmas lights out of focus. One of the great advantages, to my mind, of being dreadfully short sighted (and there aren’t many) is that if you look at a tree having taken off your glasses, the lights blur and intermingle with the sparkle from the nearby tinsel and glittery baubles – it creates a blur of light which is sensational to the eyes, and these photos almost replicate the effect.

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Finally, I close my post with a selection of miscellaneous shots, from the lights upon the fireplace of my family home where I will be spending Christmas this year, to the oversized paperchains which my partner, mother and I were making over the weekend (they’re uber fashionable this year, we hear). Check out too the understated extravagance of my little diamond-covered Eiffel towers (fake diamonds, sadly). London may arguably be the capital of Christmas, but there’s always room for a little Parisian glamour to compliment the excesses of the festive season.

IMG_2610 DSC_0037 DSC_0001 DSC_0101 DSC02399Righto, I’m off to share a moment with my Christmas trees now… until the next time, hope you’re enjoying the run up to Christmas!

It’s beginning to feel a lot like Christmas – Part I

It’s beginning to feel a lot like Christmas in London, which, as cities go, surely springs to mind as one of the most festive locations in which to spend the Christmas season. It is, after all, the city that brought us A Christmas Carol, and whose foggy streets, holly-trimmed Georgian town houses and fairy-light filled shopping streets fill Christmas cards across the globe, images which are synonymous with the festive season everywhere.

True, we don’t have many cinnamon-scented, mulled-wine quenched Christmas markets, gingerbread houses or ski slopes, and when we get snow, it does generally turn to grey mush within the hour, but what we do have is a series of super-festive ice rinks set amongst backdrops of picture-perfect architectural grandeur, huge trees filling our squares and besides our most important buildings, an almost guaranteed cold wintery climate, and shopping streets crammed full of shoppers from all over the world. It’s the very image of a contemporary Christmas. 

For we Londoners, 2012 has been an incredible year, for obvious reasons, but nothing quite tops the icing on the cake than a great festive season. I’m a working man, and my blog, as with my art, takes second place, sadly, in my day to day activities, and therefore I have been unable to go skating, to traipse around the shops for hours on end, nor to meander around the allegedly popular winter wonderland in Hyde Park. However, with what hours I have spared, I have noticed a tangible sparkle of festive feeling laying upon every facet of London like a sprinkle of freshly laid snow. And I’m loving it. So, I decided to share a few of my haphazardly shot photos and Christmassy experiences so that you too can share in the festive spirit which is cursing through the city.

The lights on Regent Street

The lights on Regent Street

In its shopping, London is practically unrivalled, and for Christmas splendour, the shopping districts and large department stores know how to lay on a show. The other night I headed to Covent Garden market which, despite being almost paralysed by cold, sparkled like a finely polished diamond. Inside the giant market, huge oversized baubles hang intermittently between giant disco balls and the permanent elegant iron lighting. Meanwhile, in the market square is a huge tree in an even bigger pot, while besides it, mulled wine stalls and hoards of shoppers help to make this one of the most festive areas of London.

Covent Garden market

Covent Garden market

Covent Garden's tree

Covent Garden’s tree

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As for me, well I met my dear friend Celia for dinner not far from the market – we headed to the Green Man and French Horn in St Martins Lane – an intimate french affair in the setting of an old pub, with low cosy lighting and some pretty hearty food – I had a feather-blade beef which almost melted away on my tongue when washed down with its rich wine sauce and our accompanying bottle of vin.

Talking of food, a few days before, my friends Cassandra, Jeremy and I headed off to trendy Islington in the North of the city, again an area of London giving boast to some excellent shopping, as well as the slightly more niche antiques and interiors market. However, it wasn’t our homes we went to indulge – rather, we were headed for Feast, a large undercover Christmas food festival, set within the very ramshackled surroundings of the old post office sorting offices, which made for quite the industrial contrast with the very popular festive spectacle below, as stalls from many a local restaurant offered a rich variety of culinary oblation, from glorious cupcakes (pictured), spicy asian cuisine, seared thai beef and mexican enchilladas, to gourmet burgers, Spanish chorizo sandwiches and fluffy pork buns. As for us, well, apart from and perhaps instead of the aforesaid, we managed to gorge more upon the liquid libations provided, from mulled wine, to mulled cider, to mulled wine again. Nothing makes one merry and festive quicker, particularly at 1 in the afternoon.

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IMG_2317Back to the shops, and none can doubt the breadth and variety of Christmas shopping on offer in this great city, not to mention the decorative supremacy of the city’s most established shops. In Selfridges, one of my favourite department stores, the 5-floor high galleries are hung with huge dinging bells, which move up and down all day long, bonging a gentle, almost hallucinogenic Christmas tune. In both Harrods and Liberty, Christmas decorations fill a generous proportion of the shop floor space, and queues for the latest quirky bauble wind around the stores. However, for the best decorations, Fortnum and Mason, my favourite of all London shops, does simply the best in my view. Pictured are some of the white decorations they had this year, but just look at their lavish tree and old fashioned staircase. What I would give to import this entire set up into my sadly staircase-less flat! Meanwhile, with the decorations bought and wrapped, head around the corner to Regent street, where a lightshow worthy of the 3 Kings themselves awaits, strung across the busy shopping streets below.

Selfridges bells

Selfridges bells

and Fortnums decorations

and Fortnums decorations

No overview of London’s Christmas would be complete without a quick mention of those wonderful ice rinks. My favourite has to be the rink set within the glorious confines of Somerset House on the banks of the Thames. With flame torches flickering around the blue glowing ice and the imposing facades of the Somerset House quadrant standing majestically all around, this has to be the picture perfect Christmas scene. It’s so good in fact that when studying at King’s College London next door some 10 years ago, I painted my very own homage to the ice rink (below). See also the rink outside the spectacular gothic palace that houses the Natural History Museum in South Kensington. This again creates a remarkable backdrop to an intrinsically festive scene.

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Ice Skating at Somerset House (acrylic on canvas, 2002 © Nicholas de Lacy-Brown)

Ice Skating at Somerset House (acrylic on canvas, 2002 © Nicholas de Lacy-Brown)

But while being out in the frosty busy streets of London is all very well, at the end of it all, there’s nothing quite like home. This very evening I have just finished gorging upon wooden platters loaded with fresh cheeses, festive chutneys, smoked salmon and ham, while with friends round for the evening, we toasted christmas with champagne in one hand and mulled wine in the other. For Christmas in the city is the jolliest place to be, but share it with friends and loved ones, and Christmas will truly have come home.

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Tomorrow, as if you haven’t had enough already, I just have to share more photos of my Christmas decorations, candles, installations and more. See you then.

On the Seventh day of Christmas, my Normy gave to me…

…seven swans a-swimming

So on the sixth day of Christmas, poor Normy never managed to give his loved one Normette any gift at all. Or, to put it accurately, he did give a gift, but Normette would have had to fly all the way out to the Caribbean to get her hands on it, and what she would do with 6 slightly sun-roasted geese complete with an underlying taste of sun tan lotion she didn’t know. So as for the seventh day of Christmas, Normy had all 3 of his fingers and his 1 thumb crossed in the hope that his next gift would be a success, and Normette had her carefully curled eyelashes equally crossed in the hope that this time she might actually receive something she could enjoy, or at the very least get her hands upon!

Up next in the 12 days carol is the seven swans a-swimming. Normy wasn’t overly sure how to go about gifting 7 swans. It seemed altogether rather extravagant to him, and what with there being some antiquated law about its being treason towards Her Majesty Queen Normabeth II if you kill a swan in her realm (allegedly she owns them all), Normy thought he had better steer clear of the real thing. Instead he had a brainwave! He could take Normette on a trip down to the local park, where, as luck would have it, there was a “Swan Lake boating park”, whereby those Norms who enjoy bobbing around on the water, could hire a swan-shaped boat and sail around the large lake to their hearts’ content. Why, he would even hire 7 of the things if he needed to!

So off they went, Normette barely containing her excitement as they went on their merry way to collect her latest present. However this excitement was, as ever, shortlived. No sooner had they arrived in the boating park, than they noticed an ugly large sign alerting them that Swan Lake was closed! The swan-shaped boats were there, but there was certainly no swimming, or boating to be done in them – the lake was frozen solid! Poor Normy! Poor Normette!

On the 7th day of Christmas my Normy gave to me, 7 swans a-swimming (2012 © Nicholas de Lacy-Brown, pen on paper)

On the 7th day of Christmas my Normy gave to me, 7 swans a-swimming (2012 © Nicholas de Lacy-Brown, pen on paper)

However there is surely a happy ending to this story… The lake may be frozen, but just look what a magical ice-skating rink it has become. As Norms young and old set out on their Norm-tailored skates, toboggans and sledges, dancing and skidding across the lake’s hardened surface, others enjoy the festive Christmas fair which has popped up around it, complete with mulled wine and traditional Christmas toys, and behind, a ferris wheel spins Norms around at a leisurely pace, affording them the best view of the frozen lake, the market and the woods beyond.

So no swans a-swimming, but this winter wonderland must be worth some brownie points surely? Well done Normy, you’re getting there! Let’s hope his luck continues on the eight day of Christmas…

© Nicholas de Lacy-Brown and The Daily Norm, 2001-2012. Unauthorized use and/or duplication of the material, whether written work, photography or artwork, included within The Daily Norm without express and written permission from The Daily Norm’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Nicholas de Lacy-Brown and The Daily Norm with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

On the Sixth day of Christmas, my Normy gave to me…

…six geese a-laying

Now Normette would be the first to admit that her presents from Normy haven’t exactly been a huge success so far. The Norm-pear tree was pretty good, albeit that it takes a lot of watering and doesn’t survive at all well in this chilly weather, oh and the partridge perched in it keeps on attempting to peck at the baby Norms; then there were the two turtle-doves who wouldn’t fly or fit in a dove cot; the three French hens were awfully chic but ever so demanding, and as for the four colly birds – by the time they had flown from their pie, shocked the guests and splattered gravy all over Normette’s living room, they then proved a devil to catch. And perhaps it’s better not to mention the five gold rings, one of which caused an irrevocable breakdown in Normette’s trust for Normy (despite his later protestations that the fifth ring was presented in homage to the carol, and not intended for another lover!). Despite all of this, when the sixth day of Christmas came, Normette was rather looking forward to receiving another gift, and Normy saw it as an opportunity to redeem himself.

Imagine their shock then when no present turned up! Let me explain… Next on the list in The Twelve Days of Christmas are the six geese a-laying. In pursuit of six egg-laying geese, Normy called his local farmer and explained what he wanted. Farmer Norm noted down the order, but was rather busy skinning some Turkeys for a mountain of Christmas orders, so he passed on the order to 6 geese on his farm explaining what Normy wanted.

Now geese are not the cleverest of birds, and when they saw that Normy wanted “six geese a-laying”, they assumed he wanted six geese lying down. Now “lay” is the past tense of “lie”, so it’s not altogether surprising that they made this obvious grammatical mistake, especially as geese are not that used to reading… Anyway, the geese, being something of a group of opportunists, decided that since they were expected to present themselves lying down, they may as well do it somewhere nice. And seeing as Normy had already sent payment to the farmer for the geese, the very same pesky birds decided to take the cash and book themselves the first available flights to a location where lying back would be enjoyable.

And so, while the six geese should have been a-laying big eggs in Normette’s backyard, where do you think they ended up? Why, lying back having a splendid time on a beach in the caribbean, and not an egg or nest in sight!

On the Sixth day of Christmas my Normy gave to me six geese a-laying (2012 © Nicholas de Lacy-Brown, pen on paper)

On the Sixth day of Christmas my Normy gave to me six geese a-laying (2012 © Nicholas de Lacy-Brown, pen on paper)

Poor Normy. Poor Normette. Let’s cross our fingers and hope that Normy has better luck on the Seventh day of Christmas…

© Nicholas de Lacy-Brown and The Daily Norm, 2001-2012. Unauthorized use and/or duplication of the material, whether written work, photography or artwork, included within The Daily Norm without express and written permission from The Daily Norm’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Nicholas de Lacy-Brown and The Daily Norm with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

On the Fifth day of Chritsmas my Normy gave to me…

…five gold rings

Poor Normy has got himself into a bit of a pickle over this one. Trying to remain as faithful as possible to the words of the traditional carol, The Twelve Days of Christmas, Normy decided to give to his loved one, Normette, five gold rings upon the fifth day of Christmas. Little could he foresee the trouble that would ensue.

On receiving the package containing her latest gift from Normy, Normette’s eyes grew wider and wider with delight as she uncovered one gold ring after another. However her happiness soon turned to consternation. You see Norms only have one arm, and four fingers – well, three fingers and a thumb to be exact. So having slipped one gold ring over each of her fingers and thumb respectively (they fitted like a glove), imagine her confusion when Normette found a further fifth ring at the bottom of the package. Why could this be? Norms only have four fingers, so what on earth would the other one be for, she thought. It was too small for her wrist, and Norms don’t have ears upon which a ring can be hung. Well then, there was only one conclusion she could make. With tears in her eyes, and filling up with rage and distress and utmost horror, Normette came to the only conclusion she considered to logically fit the facts…Normy must be having an affair!

On the 5th day of Christmas my Normy gave to me...5 gold rings (2012 © Nicholas de Lacy-Brown, pen on paper)

On the 5th day of Christmas my Normy gave to me…5 gold rings (2012 © Nicholas de Lacy-Brown, pen on paper)

Oh dear. Something tells me there won’t be “peace on earth and goodwill to all Norms” in the home of Normy and Normette this Christmas! Let’s hope Normy can make up for his faux pas with a suitably lavish gift on the sixth day of Christmas…

© Nicholas de Lacy-Brown and The Daily Norm, 2001-2012. Unauthorized use and/or duplication of the material, whether written work, photography or artwork, included within The Daily Norm without express and written permission from The Daily Norm’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Nicholas de Lacy-Brown and The Daily Norm with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

On the Fourth day of Christmas, my Normy gave to me…

…four colly birds

I know what you’re thinking – is that a misprint – isn’t it 4 calling birds? Well, here’s the newsflash – 4 calling birds is wrong! And thank goodness for Normy, whose dedicated research uncovered this now largely unknown mistake!

Yes, persevering in his hunt of the gifts fabled to be given to a loved one in the carol, The Twelve Days of Christmas, Normy was researching online to find out where on earth he would find 4 calling birds to give to his dear Normette…only to discover that actually he should be giving her 4 colly birds. Various theories exist online as to why the colly of the 16th century verse gradually became mixed up and morphed into calling birds. But now that the mistake has firmly taken hold in the consciousness of so many, we at The Daily Norm thought it was about time the record was put straight. And not only that. Normy was adamant that he would give Normette a present representing the correct version of the carol.

However, despite his efforts, poor Normy got carried away with his internet research. Having discovered that the word colly derives from colliery, (which is a coal mine) and that a colly is actually another word for a blackbird, this nickname being given because of the blackbird’s coal-like black feathers, Normy then started researching where he could buy blackbirds. Sure enough, he came across that other popular verse, Sing a song of sixpence, A pocket full of rye. Four and twenty blackbirds, Baked in a pie, and quite forgetting which lyrics he was meant to be emulating, ordered 4 blackbirds baked in a pie! Imagine then the shock Normette experienced when she sat down to a Christmas feast with her friends and family only to break into a pie full of live blackbirds! I’m not sure she will ever get over the shock!

On the 4th day of Christmas my Normy gave to me 4 colly birds (2012 © Nicholas de Lacy-Brown, pen on paper)

On the 4th day of Christmas my Normy gave to me 4 colly birds (2012 © Nicholas de Lacy-Brown, pen on paper)

Let’s hope Normy does better on the fifth day of Christmas…

© Nicholas de Lacy-Brown and The Daily Norm, 2001-2012. Unauthorized use and/or duplication of the material, whether written work, photography or artwork, included within The Daily Norm without express and written permission from The Daily Norm’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Nicholas de Lacy-Brown and The Daily Norm with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

On the Third day of Christmas, my Normy gave to me…

…three French hens

Now that’s more like it. A little bit of class, newly arrived straight from across the channel via eurostar. These three french hens are the height of chic. There’s the typically-French hen, sporting “le pullover” in iconic stripy blue and white, a string of onions and of course a little black beret; then fashionista-hen, draped with Coco Chanel’s characteristic long beads of pearls and a quilted chanel bag, along with louboutin shoes and a waft of Chanel No.5; and finally cabaret-hen, straight out of the Moulin Rouge herself, with a fetching outfit of fishnet and can-can frills, topped with an exuberant feathered head-dress (as if she needed more feathers).

Oh yes, these hens ought to perfectly reflect Normette’s stylish bearing, although she must remember that French hens aren’t just any old hens. Oh no. They require regular trips to the Harrods pet pampering salon, a cosy cashmere nest in which to lay their Fabergé eggs and a diet full of French delicacies such as oysters, baguette, moules-frites and, ewww, frogs legs… hmmm, good luck with sourcing those Normette.

On the third day of Christmas, my Normy gave to me...3 French Hens (2012 © Nicholas de Lacy-Brown, pen on paper)

On the third day of Christmas, my Normy gave to me…3 French Hens (2012 © Nicholas de Lacy-Brown, pen on paper)

What will Normy give her on day four?

© Nicholas de Lacy-Brown and The Daily Norm, 2001-2012. Unauthorized use and/or duplication of the material, whether written work, photography or artwork, included within The Daily Norm without express and written permission from The Daily Norm’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Nicholas de Lacy-Brown and The Daily Norm with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

On the Second day of Christmas, my Normy gave to me…

… two turtle doves (and a partridge in a Norm-pear tree)

These extravagant Christmas presents on each of the 12 days of Christmas are all very well, but as Normette has quickly found out, some of them are more trouble than they’re worth. Take day two’s offering. Two turtle doves? What kind of a present is that? Not only are these strange creatures a kind of hybrid between dove and turtle, but sadly for Normette, who has all sorts of Christmas shopping to get on with (not to mention a manicure down at the local beauty salon) her turtle doves appear to have adopted all the sluggardly pace of a turtle, and none of the graceful speed of a dove. Not only that, but with a great lumbering shell on their backs, how ever is Normette supposed to fit the creatures into the dovecot provided by her lover on this second day of Christmas?

Let’s hope he does better on the third…

On the second day of Christmas my Normy gave to me...Two turtle doves (2012 © Nicholas de Lacy-Brown, pen on paper)

On the second day of Christmas my Normy gave to me…Two turtle doves (2012 © Nicholas de Lacy-Brown, pen on paper)

© Nicholas de Lacy-Brown and The Daily Norm, 2001-2012. Unauthorized use and/or duplication of the material, whether written work, photography or artwork, included within The Daily Norm without express and written permission from The Daily Norm’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Nicholas de Lacy-Brown and The Daily Norm with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.