Sketch | The Daily Norm

Dec 11

On the Fifth day of Chritsmas my Normy gave to me…

…five gold rings

Poor Normy has got himself into a bit of a pickle over this one. Trying to remain as faithful as possible to the words of the traditional carol, The Twelve Days of Christmas, Normy decided to give to his loved one, Normette, five gold rings upon the fifth day of Christmas. Little could he foresee the trouble that would ensue.

On receiving the package containing her latest gift from Normy, Normette’s eyes grew wider and wider with delight as she uncovered one gold ring after another. However her happiness soon turned to consternation. You see Norms only have one arm, and four fingers – well, three fingers and a thumb to be exact. So having slipped one gold ring over each of her fingers and thumb respectively (they fitted like a glove), imagine her confusion when Normette found a further fifth ring at the bottom of the package. Why could this be? Norms only have four fingers, so what on earth would the other one be for, she thought. It was too small for her wrist, and Norms don’t have ears upon which a ring can be hung. Well then, there was only one conclusion she could make. With tears in her eyes, and filling up with rage and distress and utmost horror, Normette came to the only conclusion she considered to logically fit the facts…Normy must be having an affair!

On the 5th day of Christmas my Normy gave to me…5 gold rings (2012 © Nicholas de Lacy-Brown, pen on paper)

Oh dear. Something tells me there won’t be “peace on earth and goodwill to all Norms” in the home of Normy and Normette this Christmas! Let’s hope Normy can make up for his faux pas with a suitably lavish gift on the sixth day of Christmas…

© Nicholas de Lacy-Brown and The Daily Norm, 2001-2012. Unauthorized use and/or duplication of the material, whether written work, photography or artwork, included within The Daily Norm without express and written permission from The Daily Norm’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Nicholas de Lacy-Brown and The Daily Norm with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

On the First day of Christmas, my Normy gave to me… (daily-norm.com)
On the Second day of Christmas, my Normy gave to me… (daily-norm.com)
On the Third day of Christmas, my Normy gave to me… (daily-norm.com)
On the Fourth day of Christmas, my Normy gave to me… (daily-norm.com)

Dec 10

11 Comments

On the Fourth day of Christmas, my Normy gave to me…

…four colly birds

I know what you’re thinking – is that a misprint – isn’t it 4 calling birds? Well, here’s the newsflash – 4 calling birds is wrong! And thank goodness for Normy, whose dedicated research uncovered this now largely unknown mistake!

Yes, persevering in his hunt of the gifts fabled to be given to a loved one in the carol, The Twelve Days of Christmas, Normy was researching online to find out where on earth he would find 4 calling birds to give to his dear Normette…only to discover that actually he should be giving her 4 colly birds. Various theories exist online as to why the colly of the 16th century verse gradually became mixed up and morphed into calling birds. But now that the mistake has firmly taken hold in the consciousness of so many, we at The Daily Norm thought it was about time the record was put straight. And not only that. Normy was adamant that he would give Normette a present representing the correct version of the carol.

However, despite his efforts, poor Normy got carried away with his internet research. Having discovered that the word colly derives from colliery, (which is a coal mine) and that a colly is actually another word for a blackbird, this nickname being given because of the blackbird’s coal-like black feathers, Normy then started researching where he could buy blackbirds. Sure enough, he came across that other popular verse, Sing a song of sixpence, A pocket full of rye. Four and twenty blackbirds, Baked in a pie, and quite forgetting which lyrics he was meant to be emulating, ordered 4 blackbirds baked in a pie! Imagine then the shock Normette experienced when she sat down to a Christmas feast with her friends and family only to break into a pie full of live blackbirds! I’m not sure she will ever get over the shock!

On the 4th day of Christmas my Normy gave to me 4 colly birds (2012 © Nicholas de Lacy-Brown, pen on paper)

Let’s hope Normy does better on the fifth day of Christmas…

© Nicholas de Lacy-Brown and The Daily Norm, 2001-2012. Unauthorized use and/or duplication of the material, whether written work, photography or artwork, included within The Daily Norm without express and written permission from The Daily Norm’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Nicholas de Lacy-Brown and The Daily Norm with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

On the First day of Christmas, my Normy gave to me… (daily-norm.com)
On the Second day of Christmas, my Normy gave to me… (daily-norm.com)
On the Third day of Christmas, my Normy gave to me… (daily-norm.com)

Dec 7

11 Comments

On the Third day of Christmas, my Normy gave to me…

…three French hens

Now that’s more like it. A little bit of class, newly arrived straight from across the channel via eurostar. These three french hens are the height of chic. There’s the typically-French hen, sporting “le pullover” in iconic stripy blue and white, a string of onions and of course a little black beret; then fashionista-hen, draped with Coco Chanel’s characteristic long beads of pearls and a quilted chanel bag, along with louboutin shoes and a waft of Chanel No.5; and finally cabaret-hen, straight out of the Moulin Rouge herself, with a fetching outfit of fishnet and can-can frills, topped with an exuberant feathered head-dress (as if she needed more feathers).

Oh yes, these hens ought to perfectly reflect Normette’s stylish bearing, although she must remember that French hens aren’t just any old hens. Oh no. They require regular trips to the Harrods pet pampering salon, a cosy cashmere nest in which to lay their Fabergé eggs and a diet full of French delicacies such as oysters, baguette, moules-frites and, ewww, frogs legs… hmmm, good luck with sourcing those Normette.

On the third day of Christmas, my Normy gave to me…3 French Hens (2012 © Nicholas de Lacy-Brown, pen on paper)

What will Normy give her on day four?

© Nicholas de Lacy-Brown and The Daily Norm, 2001-2012. Unauthorized use and/or duplication of the material, whether written work, photography or artwork, included within The Daily Norm without express and written permission from The Daily Norm’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Nicholas de Lacy-Brown and The Daily Norm with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

On the Second day of Christmas, my Normy gave to me… (daily-norm.com)
On the First day of Christmas, my Normy gave to me… (daily-norm.com)

Dec 6

15 Comments

On the Second day of Christmas, my Normy gave to me…

… two turtle doves (and a partridge in a Norm-pear tree)

These extravagant Christmas presents on each of the 12 days of Christmas are all very well, but as Normette has quickly found out, some of them are more trouble than they’re worth. Take day two’s offering. Two turtle doves? What kind of a present is that? Not only are these strange creatures a kind of hybrid between dove and turtle, but sadly for Normette, who has all sorts of Christmas shopping to get on with (not to mention a manicure down at the local beauty salon) her turtle doves appear to have adopted all the sluggardly pace of a turtle, and none of the graceful speed of a dove. Not only that, but with a great lumbering shell on their backs, how ever is Normette supposed to fit the creatures into the dovecot provided by her lover on this second day of Christmas?

Let’s hope he does better on the third…

On the second day of Christmas my Normy gave to me…Two turtle doves (2012 © Nicholas de Lacy-Brown, pen on paper)

© Nicholas de Lacy-Brown and The Daily Norm, 2001-2012. Unauthorized use and/or duplication of the material, whether written work, photography or artwork, included within The Daily Norm without express and written permission from The Daily Norm’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Nicholas de Lacy-Brown and The Daily Norm with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

On the First day of Christmas, my Normy gave to me… (daily-norm.com)

Nov 26

3 Comments

The Lisbon Sketch II – Norms on a Tram

It’s another busy day in Lisbon’s Praça do Comércio, bustling central square of Portugal’s capital city, and transport hub for the many passing rambling little trams from Lisbon’s pre-war era. Here in the square which was the site of Lisbon’s former palace before revolution in 1910 made it the centre of the new Republic’s administration, Lisbon locals, business Norms, and tourist Norms alike mix, mingle and meander against the backdrop of the square’s vast geometric cobbled paving and its impressive triumphal arch.

But for these Norms, there is little time to gaze in wonder at the palatial surroundings. For now it’s time to board the number 83 tram which will take these little passengers straight along the coast to Belém, under the gigantic Ponte 25 de Abril and past the little residential districts sprawling in its ample shadow. It’s a busy day and there are plenty already on board, as as these Norms are about to find out, it doesn’t take much to fill these cute little vehicles. Best let them get on with it…

Norms on a Tram in the Praça do Comércio, Lisbon (2012 © Nicholas de Lacy-Brown, pen on paper)

© Nicholas de Lacy-Brown and The Daily Norm, 2001-2012. Unauthorized use and/or duplication of the material, whether written work, photography or artwork, included within The Daily Norm without express and written permission from The Daily Norm’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Nicholas de Lacy-Brown and The Daily Norm with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

The Lisbon Sketch – Norm Monument to Discoveries (daily-norm.com)
Lisbon – The Photos: Part I (daily-norm.com)
Lisbon – The Photos: Part II (daily-norm.com)
Lisbon – Day One: Decadence and Decay (daily-norm.com)
Lisbon – Day Two: The Ages of the Sea (daily-norm.com)
Lisbon – Day Three: The Prince of Belém (daily-norm.com)
Lisbon – Day Four: Alfama the Survivor (daily-norm.com)
Lisbon – Day Five: Bye Bye via the Baixa (daily-norm.com)

Nov 23

3 Comments

The Lisbon Sketch – Norm Monument to Discoveries

If there’s one thing that Norms do really well, it’s make a good old discovery. Why, only the other day, Henrique Norm discovered that he could eat 5 blackforest gateaux in one go, while Françoise Norm discovered that if she bounces really hard from Les Champs des Mars, she can make it almost as high as the first floor of the Tour Eiffel.

Of course Henrique and Françoise are not alone in the fascinating little discoveries made amongst Norms all over Normland every day. But the same too went for their ancestors, and it was in celebration of some of the great discoveries of the Portuguese Norms that at the beginning of the last century, the Norm Prime Minister of Portugal decided to build a great monument paying homage to their discoveries for all eternity. Why, up there on the “Padrão dos Descobrimentos” (as they call it) is Pedro Norm, who discovered that combining some eggs, pastry, sugar and a little cinnamon makes the most delicious little pastries, not to mention Bonifácio Norm, who single handedly circumnavigated the globe in search of exotic flavours for his favourite jellied desserts.

And here it is, the Norm Monument to Discoveries – discover it for yourself…

The Norm Monument to Discoveries, Lisbon (2012 © Nicholas de Lacy-Brown, pen on paper)

© Nicholas de Lacy-Brown and The Daily Norm, 2001-2012. Unauthorized use and/or duplication of the material, whether written work, photography or artwork, included within The Daily Norm without express and written permission from The Daily Norm’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Nicholas de Lacy-Brown and The Daily Norm with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Lisbon – Day Three: The Prince of Belém (daily-norm.com)
Lisbon – The Photos: Part I (daily-norm.com)

Nov 14

6 Comments

Happy First Birthday to The Daily Norm!!

Where has a year gone? When I sat down to write my first ever article for The Daily Norm one year ago today, I typed my first words with trepidation. I had chosen my wordpress theme, uploaded some artwork, and now wondered 1) what on earth I would write about and 2) whether people would be interested in what I had to say. One year later, and with 240 posts written, liked and responded to, with 180,099 total views and counting, and with some 510 current followers, I have to wonder why I was so scared. My initial misgivings soon turned to passion, as I caught the blogging bug big time.

Thanks to my blog, I see the world through new eyes – I see the polish and shine in everyday monotony, I appreciate the finer details of an exhibition or a show, I take greater note of names and situations, and I paint and photograph as though my very legacy depended on it. I no longer walk away from an event thinking – what a good show. Now I think – I can’t wait to write about this on my blog. My attitude has changed from solitary satisfaction, to a passion for sharing. I believe it’s worth writing a good post, even if one other person reads it – even if none do at all – for the process of writing about an experience, recalling the light and shade of an occasion, and immortalising an event in words and pictures gives the writer, to my mind, a tremendous sense of satisfaction. It makes you appreciate your life, encourages you to pack every hour with new and worthwhile activities, it installs a fantastic discipline of review and reflection, and it enables small experiences, which may be commonplace in one part of the world, to be shared across the globe.

The Daily Norm office celebrates its first birthday (2012, Nicholas de Lacy-Brown, pen on paper)

The Norms (my little white blobs, who were of course the source of and inspiration for this blog) and I would like to thank you all so much for your support, for your readership and for your comments over the last year. We want to thank my dear friend Cassandra who, if she is reading, knows only too well that it was she who suggested I start a blog at that time when I was so down in my life. And we would also like to thank all of those who have kindly nominated the blog for a variety of awards including the “Blog on Fire Award”, the “HUG award” (Hope Uniting Globally), the “Very Inspiring Blogger Award” and the “Versatile Blogger Award”. Your support makes me want to go on blogging, and for that I am truly grateful.

Here’s to another year of the Daily Norm!

Oct 31

8 Comments

The Daily Sketch: Prepare to Scream… It’s Normaween!!

The full moon is out, and gliding past, the menacing silhouette of a Witch Norm casting a midnight spell. Beneath the moon, the creepy dilapidated outline of a once glorious house, now abandoned, boarded up and left to decay and ruin comes into view. Within the dark echoes of its now empty chambers, something is stirring. A momentary white flash, a flutter in the breeze, the creak of a lone shutter moving in the wind. In the overgrown gardens, the century old tombs of the long dead previous occupants are starting to move. At the strike of midnight something quivers through the ground. The large, rusty Victorian gates swing open, the stone demon gargoyles upon the plinths come to life, the heavy tomb lid begins slowly to shift and at the window of the house, the previously dark interior is replaced by the screaming wide eyes of a Norm devastated by fear. All around the old mansion, Norm ghosts begin to waver and whir in the wind, moaning and howling at this witching hour, and amongst the graves below, the Vampire Norms awaken, eager in their hunt for their fresh intake of sickly sweet blood.

Are you scared? You should be. For tonight is Normaween, the night when the Norm dead come back to life, when no Norm is safe from the razor sharp teeth of the roaming Vampire Norms, and every little Norm will cower under his or her bedsheets as the screams of the Norm dead pierce their ears and bring the horrors of the underworld to life.

Keep your lights on, don’t dare go to sleep. Just prepare to scream – for tonight is Normaween!

© Nicholas de Lacy-Brown and The Daily Norm, 2001-2012. Unauthorized use and/or duplication of the material, whether written work, photography or artwork, included within The Daily Norm without express and written permission from The Daily Norm’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Nicholas de Lacy-Brown and The Daily Norm with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Halloween Party Continued… (normsonline.wordpress.com)
Halloween Party! (normsonline.wordpress.com)

Sep 20

2 Comments

The Daily Sketch: Milkmaid Norm

Now you see admittedly there’s a problem with this title. To call this Norm a Milkmaid is a little misleading, because he’s not a maid at all. But call him a Milkman, and you’d expect this little Norm to be driving around in an electric-powered milk van making his early morning deliveries around the towns and suburbs of Britain. He may go on to do that later of course (farms are generally short of staff these days – you know, what with all the reduced EU farming subsidies and all) but that’s hardly the point. I suppose as an alternative, I could call him a MilkNorm, but that just gives all the wrong ideas. Norms are white enough as they are, let alone being confused for a globule of milk (and it’s not as if they haven’t tried to tan, but it tends to turn them a kind of unattractive vertiginous purple rather than a butterscotch brown).

So there we have it. It’s a dilemma which may serve to overshadow this otherwise bucolic scene of pastures green and an attractive friesian cow being milked by her proud milkmai…man…Norm… Here we go again. I give up. Enjoy the sketch while remembering an apparently important lesson in life – not everyone can be labelled. Some Norms just want to be themselves.

© Nicholas de Lacy-Brown and The Daily Norm, 2001-2012. Unauthorized use and/or duplication of the material, whether written work, photography or artwork, included within The Daily Norm without express and written permission from The Daily Norm’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Nicholas de Lacy-Brown and The Daily Norm with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Sep 9

3 Comments

The Daily Sketch: Paralympic Norms at London 2012

After 7 years of preparation and even more before that of imagination, London 2012 will officially reach its grand finale tonight as the petal cauldron is extinguished for the final time, and fireworks fill the skies in celebration of what has surely been the most spectacular Olympic and Paralympic games known to man.

In the parallel olympiad celebrated in Norm world, the Norm Paralympic Games have been a roaring success. Here we see the paralympic stars of the wheelchair 1500km. It’s the final lap, and crowd favourite, Normi the Brit, is on the outside lap, neck and neck for second place but doing everything in his Norm power to overtake Normski, the Russian paralympian currently taking the lead. Will the crowd spur Normi on to victory?

Meanwhile in the background, another paralympian Norm takes their turn in the wheelchair discus. These sporting achievements are a fantastic accomplishment for the paralympian Norms who, by reason of their bodies’ lost ability to bounce properly, have been rendered disabled and reliant upon a wheelchair for their transportation. Yet despite this obvious disadvantage in life, they have proved that any obstacle, no matter how severe, can be overcome with perseverance and strength of will. In this respect the Paralympic games have been a lesson for us as, and their legacy, rising from the ashes of the extinguished flame tonight, will surely live on for generations to come.

© Nicholas de Lacy-Brown and The Daily Norm, 2001-2012. Unauthorized use and/or duplication of the material, whether written work, photography or artwork, included within The Daily Norm without express and written permission from The Daily Norm’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Nicholas de Lacy-Brown and The Daily Norm with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.