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Posts tagged ‘Daily Sketch’

The Daily Sketch: Pirate Norm

As Pirate Norms go, Captain Normook the Grizzly is pretty cheesed off. He used the be the big wig. The hook armed Captain of the Pirate Norms who had waged wars on soldiers and sailers, merchants and mermaids around the seven seas, stolen treasure aplenty, sold it and drunk his way into oblivions fantastic. No one crossed him, all were in awe, and only his parrot dared to answer back.

Imagine his displeasure then when this summer, suddenly all those who were in awe of him, afraid of his authority  and most of all of his ghastly sharp hook, started to rebuff him altogether. Hook for hand? That no longer impressed. Once his fellow pirate Norms caught sight of the brilliant Paralympic Norms in a newspaper discovered somewhere in a Coca-cola bottle floating around somewhere in the South Pacific, they suddenly realised that a hook for an arm was nothing – these Paralympians had lost their bounce and for countering that they deserved real respect. Thus it was that one afternoon, after far too many rum cocktails on the island of Hoopalulu, Captain Normook the Grissly was deserted by his own crew and left only to his treasure and his parrot and a few measly palm trees.

Pirate Norm (2012 © Nicholas de Lacy-Brown, pen on paper)

Let this be a lesson to you… complacency killed the cat… or something like that (appropriate adage wanted – answers on a postcard please).

© Nicholas de Lacy-Brown and The Daily Norm, 2001-2012. Unauthorized use and/or duplication of the material, whether written work, photography or artwork, included within The Daily Norm without express and written permission from The Daily Norm’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Nicholas de Lacy-Brown and The Daily Norm with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

The Daily Sketch ITALIA – Norms in Rome

Travelling southwards, down the Mediterranean coast of Tuscany and taking a sharp inland turn from Civitavecchia, the Norms have finally found themselves in the renowned capital city of Italy, the one and only Roma. And what a city it is. Crammed full of antiquity, artistic and cultural heritage from centuries of history played out within its seven famous hills. From the great Roman Empire which once ruled the western world, and the remnants of which still litter the city unapologetically, to the great Religious heritage flowing from the foundation of the Catholic Church in the nearby Vatican City, and the catholic fervour and religious architectural splendour which has no doubt resulted. With its chic café culture near the Spanish Steps, the romantic brilliance of the Trevi Fountain, and the grandeur of the “wedding cake” Altare della Patria building, Rome is a city offering everything.

For the Norms, the centre of their visit (being that Gladiator is by far their favourite film) has to be Rome’s most famous symbol, the Coliseum, the spectacular amphitheatre straight out of Ancient Rome. Not so directly linked to Rome, but inspired, nonetheless by that great age, are the tourist-touting “centurion” dressed Norms who collect outside the great arena, posing for photos for a few extra coins in their purse. This less than soldierly activity has nonetheless attracted the attention of these tourist Norms who have their photo taken with one said Centurion with the great Coliseum providing the perfect Roman backdrop, alongside a sculpture of the founders of the great city, Romulus and Remus (Norms) suckling upon their mother wolf as tradition demands. You’ve gotta love it.

Norms in Rome (2012 © Nicholas de Lacy-Brown, pen and ink on paper)

© Nicholas de Lacy-Brown and The Daily Norm, 2001-2012. Unauthorized use and/or duplication of the material, whether written work, photography or artwork, included within The Daily Norm without express and written permission from The Daily Norm’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Nicholas de Lacy-Brown and The Daily Norm with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

The Daily Sketch – Property is puzzling

Property is puzzling – that’s the generally accepted adage about buying or selling a property, obtaining or extending a lease, or dealing with annoying neighbours. And things are about to get all the more puzzling what with the UK Chancellor’s new rises in stamp duty for houses over £2 million, along with penalties for home owners whose home is sealed within a “corporate envelope”. All of this will undoubtedly lead to more and more complex tax avoidance schemes, warped prices, and a mass exodus from the London mansion market. Nonetheless, for the Norms, the most perplexing thing about the property puzzle is where to find the missing piece…

 

Property Puzzle (2012 © Nicholas de Lacy-Brown, pen on paper)

© Nicholas de Lacy-Brown and The Daily Norm, 2005-2012. Unauthorized use and/or duplication of the material, whether written work or artwork, included within The Daily Norm without express and written permission from The Daily Norm’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Nicholas de Lacy-Brown and The Daily Norm with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

The Daily Sketch: The age-old problem of how a Norm should wear a Clog

Today’s Daily Sketch deals with the age-old problem of how a Norm should wear the good old dutch clog. It certainly is a dilemma. They’re everywhere in Holland, in every souvenir shop and market, hanging from the ceiling in charismatic old cafés and flashed around on postcards as the ultimate emblem of jolly dutch heritage. They’re so tempting in their multicoloured curvaceous form, with their pointed toes and super reflective varnished finish. And the hollow clop-clop sound they make when they’re walked in is just glorious. You can understand the Norms’ disappointment then, upon buying said clog, full of promise, yet lacking instructions about how a Norm should utilise the wooden shoe to any kind of practical advantage. Norms don’t have feet you see, and try as they might to mould their bulging blobby form into feet shape, they just don’t fit. They’re tried balancing clogs on their heads, but invariably they fall off. Even worn as a dangly earring they are rather cumbersome.

The age-old problem of how a Norm should wear a clog (2012, pen on paper © Nicholas de Lacy-Brown)

The solution: why, buy an extra large clog of course (and they do come in all sorts of multifarious sizes). Then the clog really comes into its own! Here is a Norm using his clog as a skier-come-tabogan – the benefits are obvious, as that smooth varnished surface glides over the ice cold snow, the curvaceous form creating a streamlined surface built for speed, and the curved up middle providing Norm with the perfect protective wind shield. After all, how else could a Norm ski, sans feet? But this is just one example. Clog boat? Clog canoe? Clog bed? The possibilities are endless.

...And the Solution: Get a Large One (2012, pen on paper © Nicholas de Lacy-Brown)